With the Cast of Glee screeching into British shores with a string of tour dates at the O2, Im going to give all you non-Gleeks (Should I really capitalise the word Gleek?) a little crash course on the key-players a McDonald’s High School.
1. Krazy Fukyoo – The daughter of a North Korean dictator, Fukyoo copy’s all her moves from Tekken and attacks the rivals until there tits or nuts fall off.
2. Fanellala Von Pony – The spoilt little bitch of the group, she drive’s a different Ferrari into school every day, making sure she kills anyone carrying a Primark bag on her way.
3. WHEELIE! – Nothing fazes plucky WHEELIE! Sadly the other kids are so pissed off with his upbeat can-do-attitude that they batter him to death with a pair of his own crutches during the opener to season 3.
4. Belinda Blah-Blah – Forget her, she stopped doing anything fun at the end of season when she discovered she ate a baby or something.
5. Janet Loosehole – The dinner lady at McDonald’s High School, she is loved by everyone from pupils to staff even when she shouts abusive language at the minors.
6. Lady Smitzh – This exchange student from Scotland has a major drink problem and is often seen slurring her words whiling singing a heart wrenching rendition of the traditional Scottish song ‘Cock Up Your Beaver’.
7. Peter Perfect – Music Teacher Peter has touched all the kids – even the fat ones
8. Gina Gingerson – Rappin’ history teacher Gina insists on bustin’ 0ut rhymes about other famous ginger’s all day long.
9. Fred Brow – This all American jock is the school’s hero and was involved in a controversal and hard-hitting story line about some singing or something.
10. Malcolm Tutu – Deaf chess nerd Malcolm really come into his own when he joins Glee club. Obviously he is crap at singing, and everyone shouts at him to stop, but he can’t hear them, can he.
11. Liza Minnelli – I think he’s the gay one.
12. Busta Rhymes – I think she’s the black one.
To be honest I do kinda like Glee and it is worth watching if you can grit your teeth and cope with all the shit songs.